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"Love & Fear Are Two Sides of The Same Coin"
- by Akasha Lonsdale
(c) Akasha Lonsdale. All Rights Reserved.
LOVE = EXPANSION
FEAR = CONTRACTION
"What the world needs now is love, sweet love...that’s the
only thing that there’s just too little of...". These are
the opening lines of a great song and it’s true. What the
world needs now is love in its broadest sense because when
fear, hatred, desire for revenge, intolerance and anger are
present – Love is missing. Fear and Love are opposites.
Fear is contraction of the heart (not great for physical
wellbeing!). With fear, possibilities are fewer and life
can feel very narrow and restrictive.
Love holds hands with Courage to overcome Fear.
Love is at the core of our being. We don’t have to find it
– it is and always has been within us, tucked in the inner
recesses of our Being. Sometimes the journey to “re-
discover” it, can seem a long one and yet there are moments
when we glimpse it totally and may not even recognise it.
- Beautiful images "that lift our spirits"
- The birth of a baby
- Children really laughing
- Strength in adversity
- Being with a loved one at a special moment
- A beautiful starlit sky
- The unconditional generosity of another
- And many more...
Love is not soft and soppy. The love I refer to embraces
Honesty, Integrity, Respect, Open-ness, Being Real, Truth,
Courage, Authenticity, Joy, Generosity, Laughter, Stillness,
Freedom, Clarity, Willingness, Sharing, Compassion, Empathy,
Compassion ...and Tolerance.
It is a felt sense – the sense of expansion – when the heart
feels full. When love is present, tenderness and strength
co-exist. People may be moved to tears by its power but
tears can be of joy and relief too. We may feel vulnerable
but this is the paradox:
VULNERABILITY IS TRUE STRENGTH.
How can that be? Because when we are vulnerable, we are
open, exposed, REAL. We are in the flow of the river of
life, not swimming against it. We surrender, we fall into
ourselves and within we find the Love that is there – has
always been there – the eternally burning light. The light
that is. The light that will never go out – no matter how
dark life sometimes gets. It is said that the “darkest hour
is just before dawn” – many times though, great insights and
change come after a “dark night of the soul”.
DRAMA AND TRAUMA
It is as if we create the drama’s and trauma’s in life to
challenge us to look within and begin taking us back to that
place we know. A time of “re-membering”, “re-joicing”. The
parting of the 70,000 veils – to reveal the inner treasure –
LOVE. No judgements, no criticisms, no anger, no
bitterness, no recriminations. Just Love, all embracing,
all encompassing, all knowing, never-ending Love. Love that
cradles us like a parent with a new born child. Love that
holds us in our pain. Love that sometimes creates the pain
so that we may grow. Love that wraps around us like a
As you journey with yourself, get to know yourself better,
be kinder to yourself, more open, more generous, tolerant,
compassionate with yourself, so you become that way with
others. It is a natural evolutionary process. "As ye sow,
so shall ye reap."
Through this process barriers can be broken down, conflict
resolved and communication become authentic. Win/Win is
possible when Right/Wrong are not part of the equation.
Then we point the finger at others, when we label them Bad
or Evil...we have missed the point. By focusing outwards on
how others seem to be, we don’t look within. We don’t
acknowledge the shadow parts of us. The parts that can be
spiteful, vengeful, angry, dismissive, shut down, rejecting.
We like to think that we would never behave like "they" have
behaved. But...there is always a potential killer in us. A
mother to protect her child is a classic example.
Often we dress our shadow in a mantle of self-righteousness
and self justification. Worse, we just believe that we are
ABSOLUTELY RIGHT and all views opposed to ours are WRONG and
BAD. Then Love is lost and we are in a contracted place.
INNER PEACE = WORLD PEACE
These are turbulent and frightening times...but as with all
adversity it contains the opportunity for us to learn and
grow. Take time to look within yourself. "Know Thyself"
said the Oracle at Delphi- ancient wisdom that is even more
important in our modern world. Change is happening at an
incredible rate...let’s make sure that it’s powerful
change to create a world that works for everyone.
You can read more about how to do this, in Perry Akasha’s
book "How to do life – powerful pointers for powerful
living". Packed with practical information, insights and
ideas, numerous tips, easy to follow How To’s and Pause
Points, this down-to-earth, reader friendly book is
essential for anyone who wants to be more effective in their
life and relationships.
She is co-founder of The Empowering
Partnership which offers a range of powerful, life changing
personal development workshops in the UK and overseas as
well as corporate consultancy. She is currently training as
an Interfaith Minister and working on her next book "Down to
Did You Ever Wish There Was An Instruction
Book On How To Do Life? Well There is!
Buy "How To Do Life" by Akasha Lonsdale
About the Author
Perry Akasha Lonsdale is a businesswoman and psychotherapist
with over 30 years experience that includes senior human
resources, training, facilitation, consultancy, GP and
corporate counselling, executive coaching and inspirational